de inspirerende katalysator
FOLLOWING THE STREAM:
HOW TO GET AWAY FROM A LIMITING MINDSETÖ(part 2)?
The Work of Byron Katie is the management tool I use to help myself and others make a shift from fearful thinking into the deeper wisdom of our intuition. Here is an example of The Work based on the experience I described in my previous blog:''How to get away from a limiting mindsetÖ? (part 1).
I first fill in the Judge Your Neighbor Worksheet
When: a sunny afternoon
Where: along the watercourse
Situation: at work a new management tool is introduced.
1.Iím angry at the manager because he puts too much pressure on me.
2.I want the manager to be gentle to me.
3.The manager should not enlarge my overhead.
The manager should focus on serving students.
4.I need the manager to stop controlling me.
5.The manager is: compulsive, stifling, frightening, a slave driver, short minded.
6.I donít ever want my manager to spoil my job satisfaction again.
When this is done, I ask me the four questions applied to the first stressful thought:
1.In this moment along the watercourse: Is it true that the manager puts too much pressure on you? When I listen to the answer that comes from my heart instead of from my mind: Yes.
2.Can you absolutely know that itís true that the manager puts too much pressure on you? When I sit with this and look even deeper inside of me: No.
3.And How do you react when you believe that the manager puts too much pressure on you? I become angry and frightened. My muscles are trembling. My heart is pounding fast. My blood feels like boiling. Thereís an overdoses adrenaline running through my veins. It also feels like thereís a stone in my stomach. I see pictures in the future of me having a burnout. I see the management firing me. I repeat memories of past situations where I also felt threatened by the management. I treat the manager as my personal enemy. I experience him as powerful and myself as powerless and dependent.
4.Who would you be in this situation without the thought that the manager puts too much pressure on you? I relax and stay present. In the here and now. My body feels a lot better. I breath deeper. I enjoy walking along the riverside. I feel the sun warming me. I see the beautiful black dragonflies. I hear the rippling water. I trust there will be a solution thatís good for me, the students and the organization.
Then I try to find examples for the turnarounds of: the manager puts too much pressure on me.
∑To myself: I put too much pressure on myself.
Examples: I do by creating stressful physical sensations. By believing the manager to be my enemy. By creating stressful images of the future: burnout and being fired.
∑To the other: I put too much pressure on my manager
Examples: I expect my manager to agree with me that the bookkeeping system is too detailed. I want him to release his control. I treat him as my enemy.
∑To the opposite: the manager doesnít put too much pressure on me.
Examples: He didnít tell me I needed to do more than the standard. He had not in mind to use this tool to fire me. He held space for me to find creative solutions.
When I'm asking the four questions also about the other stressful thoughts I discover:
∑I want me to be gentle to myself and to the manager.
∑I should not enlarge my overhead but focus on serving students.
∑I need myself to stop controlling me. I donít need the manager to do that, itís his task to control.
∑I am compulsive, stifling, frightening, a slave driver, short minded when I react from fear.
Finally I check my answer to number 6 of the Judge Your Neighbor Worksheet:
∑Am I willing to experience my manager to spoil my job satisfaction again? Yes for I know he is not able to spoil my satisfaction. Iím the only one who can and I can stop it by trusting my intuition and finding creative solutions. Therefore I can also look forward to this experience. I see my work and the relationship with my manager as a challenge now. This means my Work on this is done.
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